Posts by The Pathway Program

About The Pathway Program

Pathway’s substance abuse rehab treatment programs provide successful teen and young adult substance abuse treatment. For more than 20 years, the Pathway Program has been a part of the recovery success and healing process for thousands of families of teens and young adults in Arizona and throughout the U.S. Read more about The Pathway Program

New Support Group Meeting for Families of Addicts in Walnut Creek, CA

By on October 28th, 2022 in California Substance Abuse, Family Support for Addiction, News & Updates, Parent Recovery

If you’re a parent struggling to deal with your teenager’s addiction or substance abuse problem, you and your family are not alone. A new support group is forming in Walnut Creek, CA to help families dealing with substance abuse and addiction. This support group for families of addicts will provide a safe and supportive space to share your experiences and get practical advice from others who understand what you’re going through. If you’re interested in attending this alcohol and drug support group for parents and family members, please read on for more information.

Why to Seek Support for a Loved One’s Substance Use

Drug and alcohol addiction is a disease that doesn’t discriminate. It can affect anyone, no matter their age, race, or socioeconomic status. If you’re the parent of a teenager who is struggling with addiction, you’re probably feeling very overwhelmed. While most parents’ natural inclination is to seek help for their young loved one, they often overlook taking care of themselves in the process.

While there are many resources available for addicts themselves, there’s often less support for parents, families and loved ones of addicts. This support group for parents and loved ones is aimed at meeting your needs as you navigate the early recovery process with your young person.

If you’re not sure if a parent support group meeting is right for you, learn more about our parent support group meetings here.

Topics Covered in our Weekly Support Group Meetings for Families of Addicts

  • How to respond to your child’s natural ups and downs through the early recovery process
  • How to establish logical boundaries in your home
  • Simple tools to communicate with your child
  • How to rebuild broken trust
  • Establishing a support system of parents who relate to your situation
  • Many more!

Family Support Group Meeting Dates, Times, and Location

Meeting Location: Creekside Hall, 1475 Creekside Dr., Walnut Creek, CA 84596

Dates: 1st and 3rd Wednesday of the month

Times: 7:30 pm

Download informational flyer

We’re excited to announce this new support group meeting for families of addicts in Walnut Creek, CA. We aim to provide a safe space for parents to share their experiences, learn from each other, offer advice, and find strength. If you’re the parent of a young addict or substance abuser, please join us at our next meeting!

Teenagers with their feet dangling.

The Pathway Program is an Alternative Peer Group for Substance Abuse Support in Phoenix, AZ and Sacramento, CA

By on August 24th, 2021 in Alternative Peer Groups, Arizona Substance Abuse, California Substance Abuse, News & Updates

As of August 2021, The Pathway Program provides alternative peer groups for Substance Abuse Support in the greater Phoenix, AZ area and the greater Sacramento, CA area. We are excited about this new announcement since the general approach of alternative peer groups fits so closely with our own philosophy. Adolescents and young adults usually must be shown a better, more fun way of life before they are willing to let go of alcohol and drugs. This is exactly the purpose of an alternative peer group.

What is an alternative peer group?

An alternative peer group is a counselor-led substance abuse support group for young people that is based on sobriety and has been shown to improve a young person’s ability to stay sober after drug and alcohol treatment is over. It is known that young people tend to relapse due to negative peer pressure at a much higher rate than adults – the alternative peer group is a youth-centered approach to helping young people navigate sobriety and thrive as they get their lives back on track.

Alternative peer group (APG) recovery utilizes 12-step principles, social connection, and fun to provide young people with the resources and emotional coping tools they need to thrive after treatment. The six essential elements of an alternative peer group are:

  • Youth
  • Social functions
  • 12-step meetings
  • Counseling
  • Family support
  • Psychosocial education

Learn more about The Pathway Program APG recovery services in Arizona and California

Our alternative peer group in Tempe serves the greater Phoenix, AZ area. Our alternative peer group in Rocklin, CA serves the greater Sacramento, CA area. To learn more about APG recovery:

 

A teenager vaping marijuana from a wax pen.

Modern Teens and Marijuana – A Talk With The Doc About Teenage Substance Abuse

By on June 14th, 2021 in Adolescent and Young Adult Substance Use

We interviewed Dr. Scott Nelson, PhD to ask him some questions about teens, drug use, and information for parents. Dr. Scott Nelson is a native of Michigan, who came to Arizona in 1970 to attend college. He earned three degrees from Arizona State University: Bachelor of Science in Psychology, Masters of Counseling, and PhD in Educational Psychology. In spite of those three degrees, he never really got out of junior high school; spending the vast majority of his career with middle school students in the Tempe Elementary and Mesa Unified school districts. He is a retired licensed Psychologist, and holds a current certification as a school psychologist.

He has a passion for helping guide early adolescent’s in their journey to become positive, productive adults. The initial adolescent smoking cessation campaign in Arizona; Tobacco: “Tumor causing, teeth staining, smelly, puking habit,” was developed through interviews with students at Powell Junior High School, where Dr. Nelson facilitated a smoking cessation program.

Dr. Nelson has a long history of association with 12-step adolescent substance abuse programs, and firmly believes that such programs are crucial in providing young people positive alternatives to the many temptations confronting teenagers. He currently volunteers his services to the students, and community, of Willis Junior High School, in Chandler.

Q: In your experience, how does marijuana affect adolescents?

A: The use of marijuana in adolescence has the potential to stunt social-emotional growth, hamper the development of effective problem-solving, create doubt, diminish self-confidence, and foster negative parental and peer interactions.

While initial substance use may be experimental and “recreational,” continued use (and increasing use) tends to fill gaps in emotional development. So, the adolescent may become prone to choosing the substance in order to feel better, rather than engage in the sometimes complicated and arduous process of problem solving. Such reliance on “quick fixes” reduces the available repertoire of more effective, long-lasting solutions to the myriad of issues that confront the adolescent.

While the adolescent may feel accepted and relieved by the use of marijuana in the company of others, there develops the need to keep such behavior “secret” from parents, caregivers, and authority figures. The weight of such an emotional burden can wreak havoc with the adolescent’s self-concept and confidence. The lifting of such a weight is a nearly universal revelation of adolescents who have successfully been able to deal with their previous history of use. They report that there are other peer-based activities that provide the same dose of emotional satisfaction, as did the previous use of the substance, minus the emotional albatross.

Q: Have you seen a rise in marijuana use in middle school aged students over the last 2 -3 years?

A: Yes, I’ve seen an increase in the use of marijuana by middle school students. Back in the mid 80s, when I began my long association with 12-step adolescent substance abuse programs, it was the students who came to me and asked for help with their use. Today, it seems like marijuana use among early adolescents has become normalized. No, not every teenager is getting high, however, whatever stigma that existed; causing some kids to seek help for their marijuana habit, seems largely to have vanished.

Q: Has the perception of harm caused my marijuana use changed throughout the course of your career?

A: No, the perception of harm has not really changed over the years. Just variations on the same theme. “It’s green. It’s natural. It’s organic. It grows in the ground. Sick people use it. It’s legal.” Most of the current perceptions miss the point, the point of my response to the first question. And frankly, it’s unrealistic to expect early adolescents to grasp the gist of my first answer. They just want to feel better, feel good, escape, be accepted. And, marijuana fills those needs well. Early adolescents, by and large, lack the emotional maturity to grasp the potential harm associated with their behavior. They just want to feel good, right now. Just Say No failed to inoculate kids against the use of substances because the focus was on harmful effects, not on filling “holes” associated with emotional deficits. What kid is likely to say “No” to an activity that makes them feel better quickly?

Yes, adolescents should be made aware of the negative consequences of substance use. We should never stop telling kids what to do, and what not to do. However, we need to realize that only providing such guidance is not enough for some teens.

Having said all that, I must comment on the latest “shiny bright thing” out there; vaping, wax pens. This is not our grandparents’ marijuana. The combination of highly concentrated THC, the lack of counteractive CBD, and whatever else is cut in, increases the potential for harmful effects exponentially. Everyone needs to know that, not just kids.

Q: Did you notice parental attitudes surrounding youth marijuana use change throughout your career? How?

A: I think there has been a general lessening of concern over the use of marijuana over the years, coinciding with the passing of medical marijuana use laws, and the legalization of possession and use of limited amounts of marijuana for recreational use. However, I have encountered very few parents, over the years, who openly advocate for, or approve of, such use by their own teenage children.

The concern here is how kids perceive societal norms. And, it appears that the use of marijuana is becoming more normalized. Therefore, the combination of the immature adolescent mind, and an apparent increase in cultural acceptance of marijuana use has the potential of leading some adolescents down a slippery slope.

Q: At what ages do you believe substance abuse prevention is best delivered in schools? Why?

A: The question here is: What constitutes substance abuse prevention education. There is no minimum age for providing children with the emotional tools necessary to confront the challenges of living. Kids do not initiate substance use wishing for such behavior to become substance abuse. Kids turn to things that make them feel better. The more confident, comfortable, and committed any child is, the less likely that child will turn outward for compensation of emotional deficits.

So from day one of kindergarten, students need to be supported, encouraged, accepted and loved. Specific education on the effects of substance use should take place at an age when children can comprehend, not just hear, such information. My rough guess is that is about in the fourth grade.

Q: How can parents help prevent substance use?

A: If there was one way to parent that would guarantee a trouble free adolescence, they would have written that book already. It hasn’t been written. Nor will it ever be written. The real danger in adhering to someone else’s idea of what you should do is that rarely does that person fully grasp the complexities of your situation. Having said that, there are some things that might help. To the extent that kids don’t have to wonder or worry, they may be less likely to turn outward to soothe whatever fears they have. Raising a successful adolescent begins way before the onset of adolescence. To the extent that one can provide structure, standards, and routines, children will have less to question or doubt. What such standards are will depend on the unique set of circumstances in each family, which is why that “book” hasn’t been written.

Adolescents crave attention and approval. Don’t be shy about encouragement, support, and love. Don’t be afraid to enforce standards, limits, and rules. Remember that it is the adolescent’s “job” to question, to bump up against your “fences.” Do not be surprised or upset when they do. Just make sure the “posts” are firmly set in the ground. Listening to a teenager’s wants, desires, complaints, concerns, does not give license to such behavior. On the contrary, it validates deeply held emotions. The nonjudgmental listening to such allows the release of pressure, thereby decreasing the potential for explosion.

Q: What can parents do to help teens build resilience?

A: Be there. Be at their “address.” Nonjudgmental listening will let you know where they reside. Love, encourage, support. Laugh. Plan. Dream. Show hope. Establish routines, things your kid can fall back on when their world, which often differs from your world, is falling apart, or shattered into pieces on the ground. Every day is a new day. Things take time. One thing at a time. One day at a time. Nothing good and lasting ever started quickly. Every journey begins with a first step – take it. Take it with them. There are no guarantees. What has happened has happened, what’s next, move forward. Help others. Encourage them to give of their time in service to others. Resilience is all about confidence, comfort, and resources. Be a resource. Be there.

Q: How can a parent best nurture a positive relationship with a teen?

A: Talk, listen, communicate. Communication Resolves All Problems. Have expectations for your children. Have standards. Set limits, and hold to them. Help your child to Properly Interpret Social Situations. Some behaviors are only acceptable in some situations. Being able to “read” emotional and societal situations is as important, or perhaps more important, than being able to read the written word.

Having a positive relationship with an adolescent starts way before adolescence. Put in the time early. All the things I mentioned in my previous response apply here.

I raised twin girls. Everyone told me, “Just you wait.” They are now 29 years old. I’m still “waiting.” One day at a time.

Q: Can you share some lessons you learned from working with adolescents?

A: My favorite therapeutic statement is: “So, what’s it like to be you?” My favorite therapeutic behavior is to shut up and listen. My favorite therapeutic plan starts with: “So, what’s next?” And, then I shut up and listen, again. What I learned from kids is that each child brings their own baggage to the train station, and that I’m not the engineer, despite all my formal education. I’m the porter. I’m just helping them see a path to get where they want to go. I may carry their bags a bit, but I will strive to always return them “lighter” than when we first met.

All kids want the same things: Love, acceptance, approval, attention. While their behavior might mask their emotions, feelings, desires, masks are temporary, sometimes protective, and, ultimately, to be taken off. I’ve learned to be extra kind, extra gentle.

Q: Is a peer support system critical to a teen staying off of drugs?

A: Yes. Birds of a feather flock together. You are who you hang with. No man is an island unto himself.

Q: If you could have teens hear one thing from you regarding substance use, what would it be?

A: Things take time. You matter. Help others.

Q: If you could have parents hear one thing from you regarding substance use, what would it be?

A: You were a kid once too. Things take time. That behavior you see that you don’t like: it’s a mask. Beneath lies confusion, fear, frustration, sadness, disappointment… just to name a few. Be a Porter, carry their baggage a bit. Return it lighter than when you first picked it up.

Matt Klein, DO is the psychiatric consultant for The Pathway Program

A Psychiatrist’s Perspective on Adolescent Drug Use and Addiction

By on April 17th, 2020 in Adolescent and Young Adult Substance Use, Videos

Watch this video about adolescent drug use and addiction with Dr. Matt Klein, DO, the psychiatric consultant for The Pathway Program, and is board certified in psychiatry and adolescent psychiatry.

If you would prefer to read, rather than watch the video, scroll down to find a transcript of the interview. Also, timestamps are provided directly below the video if you would like to skip to a specific question.

Timestamps

  • 0:20 – Can you give us a brief overview of who you are and what your role is at the pathway program?
  • 2:25 – What type of patients do you typically work with at the pathway program?
  • 3:19 – What do you think the young people you meet with drug problems typically struggle with the most?
  • 5:57 – Many parents struggle to determine which came first, the drug use or the mental health symptoms. What would you say to parents in this sort of “chicken and egg” debate?
  • 9:04 – What trends have you noticed among the young people you have seen over the past few years?
  • 10:58 – If you could give a single piece of advice to a parent who finds themself trying to help their drug or alcohol abusing son or daughter, what would it be?

Q: Can you give us a brief overview of who you are and what your role is at the pathway program?

A: I’m Dr. Matt Klein; I’m a psychiatrist here in Arizona. I am a DO, and I’m board certified in psychiatry, as well as child and adolescent psychiatry. I’m also a psychiatric consultant for Pathway. My role at Pathway includes providing input in a general sense for certain situations, or if someone needs more specific psychiatric help, they will see me for evaluation and further management. What that has often incorporated is young people who were abusing drugs, they weren’t telling their family, and they look like they have all kinds of disorders as a result of that. The family did what was reasonable and took them to a professional. Because this young person doesn’t want to stop using drugs, they lie about that, and end up with diagnoses and prescriptions and oftentimes that may not be the case because of the drug use causing a lot of emotional lability and depression and anxiety, especially anxiety, when they are not on drugs. Many of these things can resolve and we’ve seen many cases where they just resolve naturally through the treatment at Pathway. My role is often to take a reevaluation, especially when the person in treatment has become more honest about what has been going on, and really reevaluating what is appropriate or needed and working with someone through that process.

Q: What type of patients do you typically work with at the pathway program?

A: The people I usually see at Pathway are people who are in the Pathway program – adolescents and young adults with drug problems. Most typically I’m just reevaluating the patient because they have become honest about their drug use and prior to that may have appeared to have other problems because they weren’t honest about drug use and showing a lot of emotional lability or depression or anxiety or all these other things which could be a part of their drug abuse. Reevaluating that, and reevaluating their medications and helping support them through that process, especially while they are in outpatient [treatment for drugs].

Q: What do you think the young people you meet with drug problems typically struggle with the most?

A: A common problem when people are abusing drugs, especially young people, is that adolescents are at a time in life where they are getting out in the world, socializing, and learning how to navigate these situations, and often don’t have a lot of skills. It’s a time in life where they are developing these skills. The natural thing would be, if you make a mistake, to feel bad about it, go back, and amend the situation or learn to not do that again. Whatever the situation is, the consequences of life will help guide someone through that process and learn how to form and maintain relationships. If you say something that hurts someone’s feelings, you should probably feel some guilt; that’s a natural consequence of that. When people start using drugs, they abort that process. If a mistake is made, well, it’s OK because tonight, I’m getting high. That’s the process they begin to develop, and as a result, that whole natural developmental process of socializing and learning how to have emotions and respond to emotions really gets arrested because there’s a quick fix. That’s probably the most common theme I see among people I work with at Pathway. They have a reason to come off drugs, but then they feel totally inadequate because they don’t have any skills, and it’s really intimidating. It creates some extra anxiety because I’m losing the one thing that helped me through all this, and on top of that don’t have any other options, and so it leaves people really anxious. That, across the board, really does resolve throughout treatment at Pathway as people begin to go back and go through that process of developing skills and things that they are missing.

Q: Many parents struggle to determine which came first, the drug use or the mental health symptoms. What would you say to parents in this sort of “chicken and egg” debate?

A: In the substance use treatment world, or mental health world, there has been a lot of talk about this term “dual-diagnosis”. That typically has meant that someone has a drug problem, and another psychiatric problem. These can be viewed in a lot of different ways. Some people see that someone was depressed or anxious and they used drugs to deal with it, and really the problem is that they are depressed and anxious. Through our experience here, that we’ve seen, when the drug problem isn’t addressed, those other problems don’t get addressed anyway. So, regardless of if it’s dual-diagnosis or not, if the drug problem is not addressed, the underlying issues or the other problems, even if those other problems didn’t contribute to the drug problem, they still won’t get addressed very well, if at all, while using drugs. On the flip side, sometimes people start using drugs first, especially young people. They love to start using drugs because it’s fun and their friends are doing it. Throughout that process, they become dependent and it becomes their coping tool. These patients will often develop depression as a result of their drug use, or become anxious because a lot of drugs, when you’re not using them, create anxiety as more of a withdrawal effect or prolonged withdrawal effect. If someone’s dependent on drugs, and they don’t have drugs coming in or they’re not sure where they’re coming from, those people get very anxious at that time. It can be sometimes very difficult to tell, especially at the very beginning of treatment if someone had an underlying issue that contributed to the drug use or if their drug use created other issues that then become their own separate issues. The bottom line is you’ve got to take care of the drug use before you can proceed successfully in any other of those areas, at least from our experience and what we’ve seen. You’ll often find that when you address the drug problem to help someone keep from returning to the drug problem, they will have to begin working out how to cope with these other things.

Q: What trends have you noticed among the young people you have seen over the past few years?

A: Some of the trends I’ve seen… One that’s particularly interesting to me is that in the past few years people’s first drug use, at least that we’re seeing at Pathway has not been alcohol. Years ago, almost everyone’s first experience of drug abuse was alcohol, because it was so accessible. A common situation was being at a big wedding and there was alcohol easily accessible and that would be someone’s first experience using – alcohol or getting drunk before any other drug use. Today it’s much different. Very commonly the first use we are seeing is marijuana, which makes me wonder if marijuana is more accessible than alcohol to young people. That’s unfortunate, because there’s a lot of negative effects of marijuana on adolescent brain development, and that’s pretty well researched. The other trend I see is pill abuse starting really young. Sometimes that’s someone’s first introduction to drug use, even before alcohol, is getting Xanax from a friend. Benzodiazepines are a huge issue. There’s a lot of talk about the opioid epidemic and that’s a big issue as well, but we’re seeing a lot of people using benzodiazepines early or before other substances that they are abusing. These are dangerous substances. People can become addicted and have very serious consequences from withdrawal from them.

Q: If you could give a single piece of advice to a parent who finds themself trying to help their drug or alcohol abusing son or daughter, what would it be?

A: If I had some brief advice to parents in general, if you find out your child is using drugs, seek professional help or get a professional opinion, especially from people in the substance use field. A lot of people think, maybe this is just a phase, or it was just a phase for me and I’m OK now, but what if it’s not? Do you want to take that risk? If you find that your child is using drugs or alcohol, I’d say take it seriously. Get an evaluation or help from someone – a professional in the field of addiction and don’t take that risk.

Kim Miller answers 11 frequently asked questions about substance use in young people.

11 Questions About Adolescent and Young Adult Drug Use with Kim Miller, LCSW, LISAC

By on March 31st, 2020 in Adolescent and Young Adult Substance Use, Videos

The following is an interview with Kim Miller, LCSW, LISAC, and Pathway’s Chief Clinical Officer. We asked her 11 questions about the recovery process, the family’s role in the recovery process, the Aftercare process, and her thoughts on clients seeking outside therapy.

If you would prefer to read, rather than watch, just scroll down past the video. The entire transcript will be provided there. If you would like to skip to a certain question, timestamps will be included below the embedded video and above the transcript.

Timestamps

  • 0:21 – Can you briefly discuss who you are? What are your credentials?
  • 1:09 – What type of people do you typically work with at the Pathway Program?
  • 2:23 – What do you think young people you meet typically struggle with the most?
  • 3:55 – What do you find the parents struggling with the most?
  • 5:36 – At what point should someone in drug or alcohol treatment seek outside therapy or help?
  • 7:02 – Do you think it’s important to set up aftercare before leaving treatment? How do you think families should go about this?
  • 8:31 – You’ve said you believe that connecting young people into a community is important for their recovery. Why do you think it’s such a big deal?
  • 10:34 – I just found out my son or daughter is using drugs or alcohol. Where should I start?
  • 12:15 – Drug and alcohol addiction can be devastating on a family. What do you think are the best ways for a family to begin healing?
  • 14:14 – You mentioned the family having their own recovery plan. What would be some key components of a family member’s recovery plan?
  • 15:45 – In closing, is there anything in particular you would like parents who are going through these tough decisions to know?

Interview Transcript

Q: Can you briefly discuss who you are and tell us your credentials?

A: My name is Kim Miller, and I’m a licensed clinical social worker, a licensed independent substance abuse counselor, and a certified somatic experiencing practitioner. [I am] an EMDR clinician, and I do brain spotting, and I’m also a certified sex addiction therapist candidate. My role at the Pathway program is Chief Clinical Officer, and what I bring to Pathway is I have a lot of specialty in mental health, addiction, and trauma, as well as the interplay between all three. Also, I have the ability to really take a look at what’s going on for someone from all those different angles, really bringing in a three-dimensional approach.

Q: What type of people do you typically work with at The Pathway Program?

A: The clients that I work with at Pathway are adolescents age 13-17 or young adults age 18-25. I really enjoy spending time with young people and just watching them come from, maybe, a “failure to launch” kind of scenario or difficulty finding their way and then watching them become very joyful and full of life. It’s just one of my absolute passions. I love working with young people for that reason. I also really feel like, you know, the piece that I can bring is if you have young people coming in for substance issues, and then other things are arising, there’s an opportunity there to see what we can do to create a plan and that’s frequently the type of people that I end up being able to really work with on a deeper level. So if there’s trauma, or if they have some other outside issues or addictions that arise in their process, it’s an opportunity for me to be able to assess them or help create a plan for them to be successful.

Q: What do you think the young people you meet with drug problems typically struggle with the most?

A: I think young people with drug problems typically struggle the most with how to just grow up. I would say they are coming in and just struggling with … some of their failure to launch, they are struggling with, “How do I respond now to life? … for a long time now I’ve been using substances, or I’ve been very distracted by a substance-using type of lifestyle.” Sometimes the very basic things that they’re trying to do, they don’t know how to them, or they’ve never had the opportunity to do things that might be … age appropriate. I would say they are primarily struggling with, “How do I live on the planet? How do I get a job? How do I do a resume? How do I have interactions with other people? How do I have fun?”

The biggest thing that we are really working on with them is to have an enjoyable life, and have a life that’s fun and full of friendship and community. I really think that’s a piece that’s missing: if we just give people skills for progressing in life. But I think if we can give people the opportunity to also have fun and have a group of friends around them, I think that’s really valuable. 

Q: What do you find the parents struggling with the most?

A: I would say that parents who are struggling with young people that have drug problems are primarily struggling with how to parent their loved one according to the age that they actually are, knowing that they have a drug problem and their emotional growth is delayed. Watching them navigate … “How do we expect him or her to be an adult, or young adult, or adolescent,” while also keeping in mind that maybe some of their skills have been compromised. At the same time, “How do we hold them up to a high bar? How do we get them to be closer to where we’re hoping they can be at a certain age to be functional?”

I also notice for a lot of parents, what can really hold them back is just different fears, shame, or things that they feel like they’ve done wrong. Maybe sometimes they blame themselves. They think, “This is all my fault that my loved one has turned out this way.” That actually ends up being a really critical point in all of our sessions that we’re doing together – really working with the parents on how to take a look at their fear. How to take a look at things like resentments or anything that they have that they need to let go of emotionally – to just be able to dive into the present moment and see their young person for where they really are, and to get a really accurate picture of the reality of the situation, and then be able to respond to their young person from that standpoint.

Q: At what point would you recommend that someone in drug or alcohol treatment seek outside therapy or help from a professional such as yourself?

A: I would recommend, if a young person came in and we were trying to evaluate the situation, first and foremost, if somebody asks for help with some outside services or they are asking about some specifics around a certain situation, I’m all ears. That’s when I start really diving in and listening and seeing what we can do. There’s quite a few young people that will actually say, “I want to work a little deeper on this issue.” Then we get to evaluate. Is that something we would want to bring somebody into the treatment team to help with, or is this something where we can help them come up with more of a plan?

I also think that sometimes, if you see somebody in treatment and they’re getting stuck, and you’re also noticing in their assessment a significant history of grief, trauma, or mental health symptoms, you do want to catch those right away up front and be really mindful. I think it’s good to continue to evaluate people, and if you do notice that there’s different issues coming up or different situations coming up that do need further addressing, that’s a really good opportunity to take that to the treatment team and come up with a plan.

Q: A lot has been said about the lack of aftercare programs and resources available to drug and alcohol treatment patients and their families. Do you think it’s important to set up aftercare before leaving treatment? How do you think families should go about this?

A: Aftercare planning or discharge planning should happen from the moment your client hits the door. They are going to be at your facility with a really well guided staff – but what happens when they leave? This is … a really important thing to address. We know that a lot of steps back or relapses happen within just weeks of leaving a treatment center. Studies have shown over and over again the absolute importance of having plans from the moment they hit the door all the way through treatment and having those very solid and stable and in place so that the minute that they leave, they are literally walking right into the next phase of their treatment, which is part of their aftercare plan. Any program that you’re looking at that doesn’t have really strong aftercare planning, which might include social, spiritual, physical, meetings, opportunities for people to continue to grow in their trajectory. There should be opportunities for them to attend outside meetings, for them to come up and do alumni meetings, for them to hopefully be able to reach back somewhat sometimes to the staff for further support. I think all these things are really key in the process. 

Q: You’ve talked in the past about how you believe that connecting young people into a positive community is important for them to recover. Could you discuss that a little? Why do you think it’s such a big deal?

A: It’s so important that we have a community around us. Especially in a recovery community if you’re going in for help for substances or even mental health or trauma. It’s really important that we have those people around us for a sense of connection. I think a lot of people feel that the opposite of drug addiction is connection. I think that having a community is such an important part of … finding our way back to relationships. Maybe we’ve never had relationships before. I think if we don’t have a plan to include that as part of someone’s treatment or even part of them leaving treatment, I think we are missing out on a really big piece of the puzzle.

Having a community to laugh with, to share with, and to talk to is just so vital to who and what we are as human beings. We absolutely need that to help us [find] our way. I think it should be a big part of the recovery process and I think it absolutely has to be a part of the aftercare process for people to really build themselves into a support system and build themselves into a greater community and learn how to be back in with social engagement with other people. Being able to connect and be in connection and relationship with other people is so important. In my opinion, what drug use does is it separates us and it isolates us. So much of that recovery process is if we can come back into connecting with one another. It is such a big part of the healing process.

Q: I just found out my son or daughter is using drugs or alcohol. Where should I start?

A: I think one of the best ways for a family to start healing is for a young person to … get evaluated [and] for the family to treat it as if it is an issue. I think one of the biggest things we can’t do is underplay things. I think the sooner that we say to a loved one, family member, or young person in our life that’s struggling with substances, “We need to just go somewhere and talk to someone who’s a professional.” I think it’s OK to have someone come in and evaluate the situation other than a family member. I feel it’s very difficult with our own family members to get a read on if something is out of the norm or if there’s an issue. I think it’s better to not underdo something. I would rather have someone overdo it a little bit – maybe bring someone in to get an evaluation for them to decide it wasn’t as bad as they thought. One of my fears with substance use is sometimes we’re just seeing the tip of the iceberg. If we’re catching somebody in a pattern that we didn’t know was happening or we’re catching them using, there’s usually more than meets the eye. That’s why I usually tell people, one of your biggest moves is to take somebody in and get them evaluated, have them work with a professional, and ask a professional some questions.

Q: Drug and alcohol addiction can be devastating on a family. What do you think are the best ways for a family to begin healing?

As far as the family recovering, I have seen families do the best when the family members themselves are actually involved in the treatment process. I cannot reiterate enough how much having family there is probably the most critical part of the entire process. If I have a young person come in, I’m immediately looking – even if they’re over 18 – at what their family system looks like. Who can we bring into the process? [I start] getting the family members introduced to Al-Anon or other support meetings or support groups. [I start] getting a community for the family members. When I see a whole family all pulling on the same rope as best as possible, I have always seen the best outcomes. Having the whole family get involved in the process as much as possible is one of my primary goals in working with people.

I will say, just briefly, sometimes you don’t have that opportunity. You may have someone who can only bring in one family member. Then, I’m working with that person to say “bring in that one family member, bring in your sponsor, bring in a neighbor, [or] bring in somebody who’s supportive.” Bring more people into your community that we can really help be a part of the process with you. There’s something about building that sense of relationship and community … that comes into play with family members, too, whoever that young person deems as their family, like good supportive friends. I would say just bringing in the whole family as much as possible into the process, and having them have their own recovery plan, too. 

Q: You mentioned the family having their own recovery plan. Could you touch on that a little bit? What would be some of the key components of a family member’s recovery plan?

A: Oftentimes, if you have a young person who’s coming in for help, what I typically find is I have a family coming in with them who’s hurt. They’re scared. I even have family members who say, “I feel like I have symptoms of somebody who’s just lived through something that’s a really big tragedy or a big trauma. I feel so afraid or I feel so stressed out.” These are the kinds of reactions sometimes that I experience when family members come in. Sometimes [I work to help] family members get their own counselor, or help them be connected with their own support system or their own support group. I have family members who might get their own sponsors and work their own program in a 12 step program or other platform. To me, I think it’s evaluating a recovery plan for a family member to get their own support and their own services. I have them reading books. There’s a bunch of books out there that I think are a really helpful part of the plan for them. Sometimes they are doing their own writing and their own writing assignments, or doing work to let go of any fears or shame, resentments, or different things that are holding them back from responding as well as they would like to respond.

Q: In closing, is there anything in particular you would like parents who are going through the tough decisions of putting their loved one in treatment to know?

A: If you are considering putting your young person in treatment, and you’re like many parents or family members who’ve come and walked this road, just know that it’s hard, it’s difficult, there’s a lot of questions, but that more than likely if you’ve come to this point, there’s something going on that you’re concerned about. It’s not … easy to be validated throughout this process. A lot of people feel like they’re turned upside down, or they’re confused or they’re not sure which direction to take. I would absolutely encourage you just to come in and get some information. Get a little information about how to set up an evaluation to have somebody else take a look at the person that you’re concerned about. Especially if you’re not sure. It’s OK not to be the treatment center, or not to be their treatment counselor. A lot of families say that one of the most valuable things they’ve learned in a session is that they don’t have to have all the answers. They don’t have to be the ones creating a treatment center at home to try to help their young person. They can reach out to people who have experience on this to get input and help and resources, so that they can hopefully find that path back to relationship again with their family or their family member.